A Rant: Don’t Raise Grown Men

It’s been a while since I have posted a blog, but this is something that has been on my mind. I think I’m becoming a mini feminist. LOL. Seriously, I’ve just been paying attention to certain male ideas and actions and today just pretty much put the icing on the cake.

*NOTE: This may offend some people. If you are one of them, then everything clearly applies to you.*

I was really just thinking today about grown men who aren’t really grown and the women who choose to mother them. I REFUSE to raise an adult. If you can play video games for hours, find ways to engage in recreational activities (smoking, drinking, sex, etc.), wipe your own ass, then why am I responsible for you? You have the same 24 hours I do. Yet, with so many women in the world, what you won’t do someone else will so men have no worries bouncing around. Women are called every name in the book if we put a man on child support because he CHOOSES to walk away. Now, while I agree with the fact if you know someone isn’t worth a quarter you shouldn’t be opening your legs, but life happens. It doesn’t mean he gets to skip out on his responsibilities. “Well you knew he was laying up at his mom’s house so that’s your fault.” True, but he is also a grown ass man who can kick it when he wants so why can’t he be responsible?

As a woman, I am expected to cook, clean, have a job that pays well, be faithful even if I’m being done wrong, be a cash cow, hold a degree, be porn star, be a 10 at all times and not complain. If I expect the same from a man, I am wrong. I need to uplift the man when he is down. What if I’m going through something and I need uplifting? I have friends for that or I’m expected to pull myself up. NO! Don’t ask me for a glass of water from my stream if your ass is sitting on a lake. We are to compliment one another. I am not meant to plant seeds in your garden, water them, and let you prosper. I will assist you, but you are on your own because I have my own to tend to.

Many men are with women who mother them because they know that women are in stiff competition with one another to get him. HIM. Why? Because it’s better to have him rather than another woman. Men can be at the bottom and be nutured by their significant others, but let her need help carrying her groceries or holding a door open. Women, I’m sorry to say, but we have allowed the piss poor treatment to occur by accepting these less than mediocre fellas into our lives. Repeat after me: I AM NOT HIS MOTHER. I AM HIS PARTNER. I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR HIS MISTAKES. I NEED TO GIVE MYSELF TWICE AS MUCH AS I GIVE HIM. We do not have to mother him. If he can eat, he better know how to whip those pots and pans while he’s at it. You sleep here? You work here.

I’m not bashing men. I’m bashing grown children over the age of 18 who are not looking to grow. I’m not bitter. I have tried to be with someone who I could essentially mold and help out and ended up with a phone bill. I believe all women have tried just to wake up. Some don’t. To those women: you can’t change someone who doesn’t want to. Make sure you are not hurting yourself. Have your ducks in a row so that if things do not work out, you really aren’t out anything. I’m not saying to play games, but understand that a man who still calls his mom because she locked him out of the house is not ready to be responsible. Don’t let someone make you feel bad about yourself because you want someone who is on the same level as you NOW. Don’t be ashamed to grow.

To these men: grow up. Stop being a baby. You are responsible for yourself and your life, not anyone else.

*This rant was sorta repetitive or whatever, but eh…it’s late and I’m just typing from the heart.*

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